The winner of last year's Windows Ugly Sweater is ...
Register readers have spoken
Bootnotes25 Dec 2024 | 11
Bootnotes
You're so bad at recycling, this biz built an AI to handle it for you
Maybe start getting better at sorting your trash before these ML garbage bots gain sentience?
Bootnotes08 Dec 2024 | 43
Elon Musk tops US political donor list with $270M+ for Team Trump
Plus, xAI scores another $6B to fuel Tesla tycoon's war on OpenAI
Public Sector07 Dec 2024 | 127
Judge again cans Musk's record-setting $56B Tesla package
'Even if a stockholder vote could have a ratifying effect, it could not do so here,' says Delaware Chancellor
Bootnotes03 Dec 2024 | 38
Win a slice of XP cheese if you tell us where Microsoft should put Copilot next
Competition What's that coming over the hill, is it an AI?
Bootnotes02 Dec 2024 | 206
Yup, half of that thought-leader crap on LinkedIn is indeed AI scribbled
Ten rules for maximizing your grindset! #1: Let a bot do your work for you
Bootnotes28 Nov 2024 | 54
AI Jesus is ready to dispense advice from a booth in historic Swiss church
Pope, Depeche Mode, silent on digital second coming
Bootnotes23 Nov 2024 | 77
BASIC co-creator Thomas Kurtz hits END at 96
Obit Pioneering Dartmouth College mathematician died last week
Bootnotes20 Nov 2024 | 121
Study suggests X turned right just in time for election season
Significant uptick in visibility for Musk, Republican account posts from July 13
Personal Tech20 Nov 2024 | 187
Swiss cheesed off as postal service used to spread malware
QR codes arrive via an age-old delivery system
Bootnotes16 Nov 2024 | 39
Tesla Cybertruck, a paragon of reliability, recalled again
And there's no OTA patching your way out of faulty drive inverter MOSFETs
Bootnotes14 Nov 2024 | 53
Gang of monkeys escape South Carolina biomedical research facility
Lock your doors and windows, say police, but these should be disease-free
Bootnotes11 Nov 2024 | 58
Intel: Our finances are in the toilet, we're laying off 15K, but the free coffee is back!
Now that's a brew-haha
Bootnotes09 Nov 2024 | 98
NASA fires up super-quiet supersonic X-59 aircraft
Vid A try called Quesst
Bootnotes08 Nov 2024 | 91
UK sleep experts say it's time to kill daylight saving for good
It turns out morning light beats evening rays for health benefits
Personal Tech27 Oct 2024 | 282
Biz Daemon is too cool to respond to fans of his big screen work
BORK!BORK!BORK! If only all Android apps were so effortlessly stylish
Bootnotes26 Oct 2024 | 12
The horror that is VHS revived for horror movie release
POLL: Is VHS back? Cassette-bursting medium revived for latest Alien chest-burster flick
Bootnotes23 Oct 2024 | 89
'Newport would look like Dubai' if guy could dumpster dive for lost Bitcoin drive
To Wales now, where crypto bro sues to be allowed to excavate landfill site
Bootnotes16 Oct 2024 | 84
BBS legend Ward Christensen logs off for last time at 78
Obit Co-creator of the Computerized Bulletin Board System heads for big forum in the sky
Bootnotes15 Oct 2024 | 23
Tesla Cybertruck recalled again. This time, a software fix for backup camera glitch
10 seconds to Elon blaming this on Kamala or something
Bootnotes04 Oct 2024 | 76
Popular
Apple called on to ditch AI headline summaries after BBC debacle
'Facts can't be decided by a roll of the dice'
Fining Big Tech isn't working. Make them give away illegally trained LLMs as public domain
Opinion It's all made from our data, anyway, so it should be ours to use as we want
Million GPU clusters, gigawatts of power – the scale of AI defies logic
Comment It's not just one hyperbolic billionaire – the entire industry is chasing the AI dragon
The Automattic vs WP Engine WordPress wars are getting really annoying
Opinion Forks at dawn.... but it's not great sign for open source
SvarDOS: DR-DOS is reborn as an open source operating system
A #DOScember surprise: fits on a single floppy, but has a network-capable package manager
Microsoft coughs up yet more Windows 11 24H2 headaches
Users report the sound of silence from operating system update
Former NSA cyberspy's not-so-secret hobby: Hacking Christmas lights
Video Rob Joyce explains how it's done
Infosec experts divided on AI's potential to assist red teams
CANALYS FORUMS APAC Yes, LLMs can do the heavy lifting. But good luck getting one to give evidence
UK ICO not happy with Google's plans to allow device fingerprinting
in brief Also, Ascension notifies 5.6M victims, Krispy Kreme bandits come forward, LockBit 4.0 released, and more
Techie fluked a fix and found himself the abusive boss's best friend
On Call And there his troubles began …
STORIES
Scammers in the slammer for years after ripping off Apple with fake iPhone returns
Duo must also cough up $1.5M for pulling off multi-million-dollar exchange swindle
Bootnotes03 Oct 2024 | 14
US Army orders next-gen robot mule to haul a literal ton of gear
Soldiers' new best friend does all the heavy lifting
Bootnotes28 Sep 2024 | 62
Bring the joy of train delays home with your very own departure board
Working from home, but missing the voice of Elinor Hamilton telling you all services are canceled?
Bootnotes27 Sep 2024 | 67
Amazon, Tesla, Meta considered harmful to democracy
Exploiting workers, undermining public services, exacerbating climate crisis, ITUC says
Bootnotes23 Sep 2024 | 41
Cards Against Humanity deals SpaceX a $15M lawsuit over Texas turf tangle
Land purchased to save it from Trump's border wall 'completely f*cked' by 'gravel, tractors, and space garbage'
Bootnotes23 Sep 2024 | 48
NIST: New smoke alarms are better at detecting fires, but still go off for bacon
Just like almost everyone else, they still love the smell of fried artery-cloggers
Bootnotes21 Sep 2024 | 75
Thank you, Reg Readers: On Call has turned 500!
Started on a whim, almost a decade later it's a fixture – and a marvelous demonstration of your wit and wisdom
Bootnotes15 Sep 2024 | 30
Homing pigeon missiles, dead trout swimming, butt breathing honored with Ig Nobel Prize
Mad science award ceremony returns to MIT after four years online
Bootnotes14 Sep 2024 | 71
Feeld dating app's security too open-minded as private data swings into public view
No love for months-long wait to fix this, either
Research13 Sep 2024 | 8
Online media outstrips TV as source of news for the first time in the UK
Ofcom research shows TV remains more trusted news source in social media age
Bootnotes11 Sep 2024 | 107
WHO-backed meta-study finds no evidence that cellphone radiation causes brain cancer
The signal may not rot your mind, we can't say the same for the content
Science04 Sep 2024 | 105
US govt halts medical study into Havana Syndrome, cites 'coercion' of participants
What was screwing with minds of US diplomats – wait, is that a black helicopt...
Science04 Sep 2024 | 49
A last look at the Living Computers museum before collection heads to auction
A guided tour of vintage hardware set to be scattered to the winds
Personal Tech27 Aug 2024 | 37
If a cheesy '80s flick is a good metaphor for how you run projects, something is wrong
There can be only one … annoying management technique
Software16 Aug 2024 | 36
Disney claims agreeing to Disney+ terms waives man's right to sue over wife's death
Updated NYU doc died from allergic reaction after eating at Florida resort pub
Bootnotes15 Aug 2024 | 69
Say 'ahhhh' – AI robots are now gunning for your gums
Perceptive turns its automated dental dynamo on humans, and Zuck's dad thinks it's great
Bootnotes02 Aug 2024 | 25
Happy Sysadmin Day, the Bitlocker keys are in a bowl on top of the fridge
Vote below for the best way to celebrate our underappreciated heroes
Bootnotes26 Jul 2024 | 20
Sam Altman sues builder over $27M flooded, sewage-hit 'lemon' of a mega-mansion
Leaking skylights, collapsed roof, garbage-clogged pipes - did ChatGPT make this?
Bootnotes18 Jul 2024 | 88
'Gay furry hackers' say they've disbanded after raiding Project 2025's Heritage Foundation
Ultra-conservative org funnily enough not ready to turn the other cheek
Bootnotes12 Jul 2024 | 64
Trump threatens to send Meta's Mark ‘Zuckerbucks’ to prison if reelected president
Updated If you were wondering how the US White House race is going in 2024, it's going like this...
Bootnotes11 Jul 2024 | 185
Amazon puts down its Astro robotic business watchdog
Now even the 'droids are being laid off – sheesh!
Bootnotes03 Jul 2024 | 19
War on Texas law requiring ID to savor smut online heads to Supreme Court
Talk about painfully invasive processes
Bootnotes02 Jul 2024 | 51
Boeing to reacquire spun-off supplier Spirit AeroSpace to shore up safety
Because the best place for a troubled supplier is beneath the wing of original parent company
Bootnotes01 Jul 2024 | 25
Microsoft founder Paul Allen's tech museum closes, sells off collection
Letter from Einstein, vintage space suit, and ancient computers all up for sale
Bootnotes26 Jun 2024 | 44
Glastonbury to turn festivalgoer pee into eco-friendly fertilizer
Now that's what you call a golden harvest
Bootnotes26 Jun 2024 | 39
Footage of Nigel Farage blowing up Rishi Sunak's Minecraft mansion 'not real'
Hats off to The Guardian for double checking, though
Bootnotes19 Jun 2024 | 87
NASA hits wrong button, broadcasts ISS emergency training by mistake
Simulation stimulates social media panic
Bootnotes13 Jun 2024 | 17
Italian premier taps Pope Francis to warn G7 of AI disaster if ethics ignored
Holy smokes, don't screw this up
Bootnotes12 Jun 2024 | 5
Michael Dell lends support to bid for Everton Football Club
Texan Mick set to become honorary blue Scouser if winning bid hits back of the net
Bootnotes10 Jun 2024 | 6
Tetris Company celebrates classic game's 40th birthday
You're not a 1985 truther, are you?
Bootnotes06 Jun 2024 | 28
From meatballs to metaverse – IKEA's flatpack fantasy lands on Roblox
Swedish furniture giant has 10 paid in-game jobs to fill
Bootnotes05 Jun 2024 | 9
Tesla slams advisors for not loving Musk's $44.9B payout
We hired you for one job...
Bootnotes30 May 2024 | 85
LLMs can write and answer quizzes – but aren't quite ready to disrupt trivia night
Feed AutoQuizzer a URL and it will use LLaMa-3 to make a decent multiple-choice test
AI + ML29 May 2024 | 10
Bored students can now enjoy Sonic 2 on TI-84 Plus CE calculators, thanks to port
Retro interview Blast (processing) from the past
Bootnotes26 May 2024 | 24
Pew: Quarter of web pages vanished in past decade
Luckily we have the Wayback Machine
Personal Tech20 May 2024 | 27
Really? A sarcasm detector? Wow. You shouldn't have
Computers learning to spot sass – what could go wrong?
Bootnotes20 May 2024 | 41
Samsung takes bite out of Apple over its mega marketing misstep
'We would never crush creativity,' says South Korea megacorp
Bootnotes16 May 2024 | 26
Forget feet and inches, latest UK units of measurement are thinking bigger
Reg Standards Bureau Testing wind turbine blades the size of three rusty angel wingspans
Bootnotes16 May 2024 | 90
Dublin debauchery derails Portal to NYC in six days flat
Webcam art installation quickly descends into public Chatroulette
Bootnotes15 May 2024 | 62
Destroying offshore wind farms is top priority for Trump if he returns to presidency
It’s definitely to protect the whales and not the fossil fuel industry
Bootnotes14 May 2024 | 283
Cops developing Ghostbusters-esque weapon to take out e-bike thugs
'Who you gonna call?' Dunno, my phone's been stolen
Bootnotes14 May 2024 | 68
Blue screen of death or Eurovision's Windows95man performance – what's less annoying?
Those with a delicate constitution, look away now
Bootnotes13 May 2024 | 179
Apple crushes creativity and its reputation in new iPad ad
Comment Someone in marketing may be getting fired for this
Bootnotes10 May 2024 | 126
UK's National Cyber Security Centre entry code cracks up critics
One, two, three, four is all you need to pass that door
Bootnotes10 May 2024 | 51
I told Halle Berry where to go during a programming gig in LA
On Call Five-star techies share stories of working from the lap of luxury
Devops10 May 2024 | 95
Baidu's PR head has a PR problem after workaholic social media posts
Updated Praising 996 culture is so Jack Ma 2019
Bootnotes09 May 2024 | 15
Tesla devotee tests Cybertruck safety with his own finger – and fails
Faith in frunk flunks
Bootnotes08 May 2024 | 136
AI Catholic 'priest' defrocked after recommending Gatorade baptism
Devotees were speaking to an entity who didn't exist – imagine that
Bootnotes03 May 2024 | 140
Cloudflare CEO sues over free-roaming fidos at his ski resort paradise
Who let the dogs out?
Bootnotes29 Apr 2024 | 32
Throwflame launches fire-spitting robo-dog from Hell
The Thermonator can be yours for just $9,420
Bootnotes25 Apr 2024 | 54
Silicon Valley roundabout has drivers in a spin
Accidents at intersection quadruple
Bootnotes23 Apr 2024 | 88
Crypto conferences liquidated after biblical flooding in Dubai
There's something nice about seeing Web3 fanatics in ankle-deep water
Bootnotes17 Apr 2024 | 17
Judge refuses to Ctrl-Z divorce order made by a misclick
Computer says you're single
Bootnotes16 Apr 2024 | 57
X fixes URL blunder that could enable convincing social media phishing campaigns
Poorly implemented rule allowed miscreants to deceive users with trusted URLs
CSO10 Apr 2024 | 27
Sleuths who cracked Zodiac Killer's cipher thank the crowd
Fifty-one years of community contributions, software, and clever cryptanalysis contributed
Bootnotes04 Apr 2024 | 38
Rancher faces prison for trying to breed absolute unit of a sheep
Ewe-nique endeavor aimed to create Jurassic Baaa-rk experience for hunters
Bootnotes14 Mar 2024 | 111
'Chemical cat' on the loose in Japanese city
Unlikely to survive hexavalent chromium dip, officials ask residents to keep an eye out
Bootnotes13 Mar 2024 | 69
Olympic-level server tossing contest seeks entrants – warranty voiding guaranteed
It's geeks gone wild
Bootnotes06 Mar 2024 | 16
Willy Wonka event leaves bitter taste with artificially sweetened promises
Charlie and the AI factory flop compared to 'meth lab'
Bootnotes28 Feb 2024 | 45
Palantir boss says outfit's software the only reason the 'goose step' has not returned to Europe
Motor-mouth CEO Alex Karp claims biz stopped 'innumerable' terror attacks in Europe
Bootnotes28 Feb 2024 | 97
Google Maps leads German tourists to week-long survival saga in Australian swamp
Pair had to dodge croc on trek back to civilization
Bootnotes23 Feb 2024 | 77
Google releases Gemma – LLMs small enough to run on your computer
Your own personal chatbot awaits
Bootnotes22 Feb 2024 | 8
London's famous BT Tower will become a hotel after £275M sale
Hello room service? Can you call your provider? The Wi-Fi is down. Hello?
Bootnotes21 Feb 2024 | 67
Tesla's Cybertruck may not be so stainless after all
'Literally bulletproof' but needs constant cleaning to stave off corrosion
Bootnotes13 Feb 2024 | 212
Quarter of polled Americans say they use AI to make them hotter in online dating
Roses are red, violets are blue, a machine made my profile alluring to you
AI + ML12 Feb 2024 | 26
Building a 16-bit CPU in a spreadsheet is Excel-lent engineering
But can it run Doom?
Bootnotes02 Feb 2024 | 23
Add bacteria to the list of things that can run Doom
Frame rate would be even worse than the original, though. MUCH worse
Bootnotes31 Jan 2024 | 28
Robots with a 'Berliner Schnauze' may appear more trustworthy to locals
Dialect study a mixed bag when it comes to droids speaking highbrow German
Bootnotes31 Jan 2024 | 22
Windows 3.11 trundles on as job site pleads for 'driver updates' on German trains
Remember making Windows and DOS talk to a network? You could go back to the future with this assignment
Bootnotes30 Jan 2024 | 107
Techie resurrects teletext on a vintage BBC Master
You can get Ceefax via a Pi, but behold it in its most exotic of habitats
Bootnotes30 Jan 2024 | 20
We put salt in our tea so you don't have to
Poll Despite US chemistry boffin claiming it improves the taste, we respectfully disagree
Bootnotes27 Jan 2024 | 204
AI-driven booze bouncers can ID you with face scan
Cheerio to cheeky Chardonnay chancers
Bootnotes25 Jan 2024 | 27
Apple's Vision Pro costs big bucks to buy and repair ... just don't mention the box design
Still, up to 180,000 units sold under pre-order and China gray market prepping locals
Bootnotes25 Jan 2024 | 7
'Birthplace of Amazon' on the market for $2.28M
'Affordable' for the neighborhood
Bootnotes24 Jan 2024 | 21
DPD chatbot blasts courier company, swears, and dabbles in awful poetry
So this is the AI revolution
Bootnotes23 Jan 2024 | 48
Tech bros are playing God, Catholic Church's AI priest complains
Effective altruism blamed for Silicon Valley's desire to heal humanity's woes
Bootnotes22 Jan 2024 | 14
Silicon Valley weirdo's quest to dodge death – yours for $333 a month
Wonder when he's going to give that 28-year-old their skin back
Bootnotes11 Jan 2024 | 87
Michael Dell: Don't worry about AGI, after all we solved that ozone layer thing
Budget, schmudget, when it comes to AI-enabled productivity gains, says exec
Bootnotes11 Jan 2024 | 10
Data wrangler Zuckerberg becomes world's least likely cattle rancher
What a cowboy!
Bootnotes10 Jan 2024 | 19
The Register's 2023 in gaming had one final boss: Baldur's Gate 3
The RPG But we also have a bit to say about Dark Souls, Starfield, Foxhole, and more
Bootnotes05 Jan 2024 | 30
Biting the hand that feeds IT
